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Anti-broccoli bigots march on

March 13, 2012

Oviously unjust prejudice against inoffensive vegetable marches on. Improperly extending and applying a sarcastic extension of the zeitgeist’s conventional wisdom:

All vegetables are equal, but some vegetables are less equal than others.

Thus supposedly justified, anti-broccoli bigots march on.

Judge Laurence H. Silberman of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the D.C. Circuit posed that very question last fall, asking the administration’s attorneys whether it would be unconstitutional for the government to require Americans to buy broccoli. The attorneys said no, but added that “it depends.” The court ultimately upheld the law.

But if the government required all persons to eat broccoli the anarchy engendered would make the results of the requirement that all persons not drink alcohol look like a Sunday school picnic.

"It's broccoli, dear." "I say it's spinach, and I say the hell with it."

The all time most popular New Yorker cartoon and the forthright statement of a recent president bear testimony to near universal ignorance and the resulting unjustified prejucdice and bigotry.

I do not like broccoli and I haven’t liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I’m President of the United States and I’m not going to eat any more broccoli. Now look, this is the last statement I’m going to have on broccoli. There are truckloads of broccoli at this very minute descending on Washington. My family is divided. For the broccoli vote out there: Barbara loves broccoli. She has tried to make me eat it. She eats it all the time herself. So she can go out and meet the caravan of broccoli that’s coming in.

In our age of advanced information technology there is no excuse for improper vegetable preparation leading to bigotry and prejudice.

On the other hand, I find myself increasingly peeling broccoli, which I find improves it greatly.But for most vegetables, most days, a good scrub and I’m happy.

The bitterness and fibrousness are in the lower and outer parts of the stalk. Children and presidents have been unnecessarily persecuted through culinary ignorance and/or sloth.

And we laugh at our forebears who thought that tomatoes were toxic because the leaves are.

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